THE IDIOT...


I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice from the other stall saying:
"Hi, how are you?"

I'm not the type to start a conversation in the rest-room but I don't know what got into me, so I answered, somewhat embarrassed,
"Doin' just fine!"

And the other person says:
"So what are you up to?"

What kind of question is that? At that point I'm thinking this is too bizarre so I say:
"Uhhh, I'm like you, just traveling!"

At this point I am just trying to get out as fast as I can when I hear another question.
"Can I come over?"

Ok, this question is just too weird for me but I figured I could just be polite and end the conversation. I tell them ,
"No........I'm a little busy right now!!!"

Then I hear the person say nervously... "Listen, I'll have to call you back. There's an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions!!!"

"Dad, can i ask you something?"
"Sure! What about?"
"You see, I'm already fourteen and...I think
it's just proper that i should own one."
"And what is this 'one' you're referring to?"
"Could you buy me a neat set of brassieres?"
"No."
"My nipples are already prominent and it
catches attention."
"Nope."
"It will be just proper at my age..."
"I said no way...!"
"But all of my friends wears.......!"
"David! How many times shall i tell you that
bras are for girls!?"

A woman walks into a bar and orders a bottle of Louis Roederer Cristal. Pulls down her thong, jumps on the bar and pours the whole bottle over her fanny.

The bar man shouts: why did you do that? She replies: I've just won the lottery, and thats the only cunt i'm sharin it with!




Three guys in a Private Health Club Sauna; An American, Japanese and irishman. They hear a beeping sound, the american touches his arm and says: Thats my pager, i have a microchip in my under my skin. Then a phone rings, the Japanese guy lifts his palm to his ear and answers a call 'I have a microchip phone in my hand' he boasts. The irish man, feeling very lowtech, goes to the toilet and comes back with toilet paper hanging from his arse: Oh Jaysus, he shouts, would you look at dat, im getting a fax from head office.





An arsenal fan, a spurs fan and a jamaican were all in a maternity ward
When the nurse said " I'm very sorry but we have mixed up your babies, your going to have to pick yours out"

So the arsenal fan walks over and picks the black baby, at this point the jamaican says " thats clearly my baby" to which the arsenal fan replies " look mate one of those other two is a yid and I'm not willing to take that fucking chance" !

THE BEER PRAYER

Our lager w/ art in barrel
Hallowed be thy drink
Thy will be drunk (i will be drunk)
At home as i am in the tavern

Give us this day our foamy head
and forgive us our spillages.
As we forgive those who will spill
Against us,

And bad us not to incarnation
But deliver us from hangovers.
For thine us the beer.
The better and the lagger.

Forever and ever..


BEERMEN!!!!

="nomadfist":375oj682 said:THE IDIOT...


I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice from the other stall saying:
"Hi, how are you?"

I'm not the type to start a conversation in the rest-room but I don't know what got into me, so I answered, somewhat embarrassed,
"Doin' just fine!"

And the other person says:
"So what are you up to?"

What kind of question is that? At that point I'm thinking this is too bizarre so I say:
"Uhhh, I'm like you, just traveling!"

At this point I am just trying to get out as fast as I can when I hear another question.
"Can I come over?"

Ok, this question is just too weird for me but I figured I could just be polite and end the conversation. I tell them ,
"No........I'm a little busy right now!!!"

Then I hear the person say nervously... "Listen, I'll have to call you back. There's an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions!!!"

>tnx

i'am not be surprised if it's not a joke but a real incident with j. bush